Here goes...

I met with my Oncologist on Tuesday, and told him why I was not terribly excited about more chemo. He was great, told me all about what he wanted to put me on, and accepted my decision to forgo further treatment. He understands this is not a curative path and that I am feeling pretty good and want to have quality of life. I met with hospice today, so all that is taken care of and I am at peace with my decision

I want everyone to know I am not giving up. I accept and pray for a miracle. I know the healing will not come from the chemo or the herbs or the rife or anything external. It will come from God.

I feel strong and healthy. I want my mind to be conscious and aware. This is the next chapter, and it is important that I face it with all my faculties intact....

Blessings to all
Dyal

It has been a while..

I have been remiss in not keeping the blog up to date, so here goes all the news that is fit to print from August till now.
The latest first: I had a PET scan on Wednesday, and got the results yesterday. The results are really disappointing. The tumor in my right lung has returned and is "extensive" The lymph in my chest and all the way into my right neck is involved. The doctor wants me on chemo, and I have not decided to do that. I am researching the drugs. I do not want to live the rest of my life sick. The medicine will not heal me, it may elongate my life, but I have to look at the side effects...

Last month I was in the hospital for a 5 day stay. I had a pleural effusion and had a hard time breathing, so a procedure was done to drain the fluid and I ended up with a chest tube. The hospital stay really kicked my butt. Right after I traveled to New England for Steve & Lynne's wedding. (Steve's son) It was really wonderful, and great to see New England again, the leaves and all the smells. We stayed at my dear friend Ree's place in Plymouth... Visited the family and had a nice time. When I got home, I crashed.

In September I had a followup MRI of the brain. The original tumor seems to be still "gone", just a bit of swelling. Unfortunately, the discovered three more tumors. They are really small, and they advised full brain radiation. I said no thanks. I will not put my head in the oven!!!

That is the bare bones. I am confused, disappointed, upset, and OK all at the same time. Quality of life is most important to me. Longevity does not seem to be in the cards, but as you all know I am totally open to a miracle.... Perhaps the miracle here is just to live in God's Grace. Each breath is a gift and each moment is an opportunity.

May you all be blessed. Lovingly Dyal Kaur (Martha)